Redefining Success: Why I Quit the Rat Race and Built My Own Path

For years, I chased society's idea of success, and honestly? It left me burnt out. So, I quit. I quit my job. I quit the rat race. All of it.

What I realized is that success isn’t what we’ve been told it is. And I want to share how I chose to redefine it—and what it means to me now.

My Early Definition of Success

If you had asked me in my 20s what success looked like, I would have said it was all about prestige:

  • A well-regarded job

  • A managerial position or higher salary

  • Recognition from peers and mentors

When I became a therapist, my idea of success shifted slightly: I wanted to be an expert in my field, maybe even a professor at a university. Money was part of it, sure—but prestige was the bigger focus.

To meet that version of success, I hustled. Hard. I overachieved. I worked full-time while finishing my master’s degree, always striving to impress my bosses, my teachers, my peers.

And in 2021, it caught up with me. I hit a severe burnout that forced me off work for six months.

Embracing Slow Living

That burnout was the beginning of my slow living journey. Slow living isn’t about doing less; it’s about doing what truly matters:

  • Recognizing your values

  • Living aligned with them

  • Figuring out what’s essential

I wish I could say my view of success shifted immediately—but it didn’t. My understanding of success has continued to evolve over the years, as my life and priorities changed.

Right now, what matters most to me is having:

  • A calm, intentional life

  • Energy for my daughter, my family, and friends

  • Businesses built around supporting that life

And if your idea of success changes over time? That’s normal. It’s actually a strength. It shows that you’re attuned to yourself and aware of your inner world.

What Success Means to Me Today

Describing my current version of success to others is tricky because it blends slow living with ambition:

  • I want slow mornings, time for myself, and sustainable energy.

  • I want to build businesses that generate income but don’t consume my life.

I’m building a lifestyle business—one that provides freedom, not just wealth. The goal isn’t to build an empire to sell later, but to create a business that supports my values: time, flexibility, and energy for the things I love.

The Freedom Factor

A concept that really resonated with me comes from The Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel. He defines success as:

“The freedom to do what I want, when I want, for as long as I want.”

At first, that might sound like yachts and parties—but for me, it’s about having choice. When I started my private practice, I made career moves to gain experience and credibility, knowing I could do it on my own timeline. I didn’t feel trapped in a job; I had the freedom to choose.

The same principle applies to business:

  • Build your business to buy back your time

  • Delegate tasks that drain your energy

  • Use your time in ways that align with your priorities

This freedom—to work, rest, parent, and live intentionally—is my current definition of success.

Success Is Choosing Your Life

For me, success isn’t a title, a salary, or a checklist. It’s:

  • Choosing how I spend my time

  • Prioritizing my family and self-care

  • Building a business that supports my life, not consumes it

Success is the freedom to change as my life changes, to adapt my goals to what matters most in each season. It’s not about meeting society’s expectations—it’s about creating a life I actually want to live.

Books That Changed My Perspective

Two books that shaped this view:

  1. The Psychology of Money by Morgan Housel – Understanding wealth as freedom.

  2. Buy Back Your Time by Dan Martell – Building a business that allows you to reclaim your time.

Both emphasize that success is about control, freedom, and intentionality—not just money or prestige.

Reflect and Choose

What does success mean to you? Are you living someone else’s version of it, or your own?

I hope this encourages you to pause and ask yourself: Am I living the life I truly want?

Your version of success is yours to define—and you get to choose it.

Watch the full video version of this blog here: What Success REALLY Looks Like - It's NOT What You Think

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