The Slow Motherhood Aesthetic (And Why It’s Not the Point)
Today, I want to talk about something that’s been on my mind: the slow motherhood aesthetic—and why it’s not the heart of slow living at all.
My Journey Wasn’t Aesthetic
Before I became a slow living advocate, I was the opposite:
A high-strung overachiever who didn’t know how to rest or care for herself. I believed hustle and productivity were the only ways to earn worth or deserve anything. And even then, I didn’t feel worthy.
After my burnout in 2021, I realized:
There has to be more to life than working, being exhausted, and feeling like crap.
So I went searching.
Naturally, that led me to Pinterest.
And what did I find?
Minimalist homes with nothing out of place
People living on farms
Cottage-core everything
Homemade bread
Prairie dresses
Videos with that soft beige vintage filter
Honestly, if slow living had a colour, it would be beige. Very beige.
And listen—if that’s your vibe, I love that for you. Truly.
One of my friends lives that aesthetic beautifully.
But… it’s not me. Not even a little.
The Pressure to “Look” Slow
In the beginning, I felt like I had to fit that aesthetic to be taken seriously.
I remember thinking:
“If I don’t film outside enough…
If I don’t have a garden…
If I don’t bake my own bread…
Will anyone believe I’m ‘slow motherhood’?”
But here’s what I’ve learned:
People often don’t know what they need. They only know what inspires them.
Pinterest and Instagram are full of wish fulfillment, not reality.
They show the imagery, not the values.
They show the activities, not the heart.
What Slow Motherhood Actually Is
For me, the core of slow motherhood has nothing to do with bread, gardens, or prairie dresses.
Slow motherhood is:
1. Knowing your values
Identifying what actually matters to you, not what Instagram says should matter.
2. Eliminating drains
Removing what exhausts you—mentally, emotionally, logistically.
3. Choosing what’s essential
Keeping only what aligns with your values.
4. Living with intention
Acting on purpose rather than reacting to expectations.
My own values are health, family, and connection.
Those guide how I show up—not the aesthetic.
And your values don’t have to match mine.
You can prioritize your career.
You can love your work.
You can be ambitious and still be a slow mother.
Slow living isn’t anti-work—it’s anti-hustle.
Slow Motherhood Is a Rebellion
This part matters deeply to me:
Slow motherhood is a revolutionary act.
It’s saying:
No more hustling.
No more “good moms do it all.”
No more societal expectations that burn us out.
No more narratives telling us what motherhood should look like.
Because hustle culture doesn’t serve you.
It serves capitalism.
It serves employers.
And it leaves mothers depleted, disconnected, and doubting themselves.
We deserve more than that.
Our children deserve more than that.
Your Presence Matters More Than the Aesthetic
You can make bread… or not.
You can garden… or not.
You can sew, forage, craft, or none of the above.
None of those things are “slow motherhood” on their own.
They’re just vehicles for connection.
The real ingredient—the thing your child will remember—is your presence.
Not the hobby.
Not the backdrop.
Not the aesthetic.
Your presence is the most important thing.
You Don’t Have to Look a Certain Way
I don’t wear dresses.
I love graphic tees.
I prefer being indoors.
I swear, I laugh loudly, I question things, I sing random songs.
I’m not soft or delicate in the way the aesthetic suggests.
And yet…
I am living slow motherhood.
Because I:
Prioritize my values
Center what matters
Choose presence over perfection
Build strong attachment
Care for my health
Choose family intentionally
Release societal expectations that don’t serve us
That’s the heart of it.
So—What Does Slow Motherhood Look Like for You?
Not Pinterest.
Not Instagram.
Not beige filters.
You.
Your life.
Your values.
Your season.
Your family.
That’s what matters.