Raising “Living Room Kids”: A Conversation on Play, Boundaries, and Slowing Down
I recently had my good friend Natasha—who is also a Child Development Consultant—on my podcast. This was Natasha’s second time on, and this time, we explored something I think so many of us will relate to: what it means to raise “living room kids.”
But before we get there, we had to start with where we came from.
From Bedroom Kids to Living Room Kids
Natasha and I quickly realized we grew up the same way — as “bedroom kids.”
If you’re wondering what that means, here’s the simple version:
Bedroom kids were the ones who played mostly in their rooms — where all the toys, books, video games, art supplies, and imagination lived. The “adult areas” of the house were separate. Living rooms stayed pristine.
Looking back, I had everything in my room:
my Nintendo, my books, my Pogs (even though I never figured out how to use them), my computer… all of it. Natasha had the same experience — except she was the child who lovingly tucked in her baby dolls while I was the kid cutting their hair and removing their heads for “creative projects.”
But the core feeling was the same:
kids played out of sight.
Now?
My daughter is very much a living room kid — and honestly, I love it.
What Is a Living Room Kid?
A living room kid is simply a child whose primary play space is the shared family space. There’s no elaborate playroom hidden away in the basement or behind closed doors. Their toys live where life happens.
And it turns out, this comes with some beautiful benefits.
The Benefits of Raising Living Room Kids
(According to both lived experience… and an actual expert: Natasha.)
1. They Learn Through Real-Life Modeling
Children learn primarily through observing us — not through lectures.
When they’re close by, they naturally pick up:
how we move through our routines
how we care for the home
how we treat people
how we rest, clean, create, and connect
The other day, my daughter followed me into the bathroom and brushed her teeth exactly the way I did — toothbrush hands-free in her mouth while fixing her hair. Those moments hit home. They’re watching everything.
2. They Learn Respect for Shared Spaces
A lot of parents worry about:
broken TVs
jumping on couches
drawing on walls
ruined furniture
And yes — these things can happen. But Natasha reminded me that with consistency, kids do learn what’s okay and what’s not.
Setting boundaries early, redirecting gently, and staying consistent teaches them how to treat shared spaces with respect. And that skill goes everywhere with them — to grandparents’ homes, friends’ homes, and beyond.
3. They Learn to Be Part of Family Life
Living room kids learn to exist alongside us.
They’re not isolated.
They learn to socialize by observing real interactions.
They see:
how we host friends
how we talk to each other
how we problem-solve
how we handle frustrations
It’s a natural, built-in way to teach emotional regulation and social cues.
Let’s Talk Boundaries (and Real-Life Discipline)
Of course, having kids in the living room means constant opportunities for boundary-setting.
Natasha shared something important:
Before about 16–18 months:
kids need gentle redirection.
Once they hit toddlerhood:
consistent, simple corrective actions help them learn.
Not lectures.
Not guilt.
Not “gentle shaming.”
Just clear, calm boundaries like:
“Crayons stay on paper.”
“We sit on our bums on the couch.”
“If we draw on the wall, the crayons go away.”
And consistency matters so much.
I had a moment of fear when we got an art table with easy access to crayons. I thought for sure my walls were done for. But with redirection and consistency, she now knows where crayons belong.
Do kids still test boundaries?
Absolutely — every six months or so, developmentally, they will. And that’s normal.
Offering Options: A Helpful Tool
One of Natasha’s favorite strategies is offering alternatives instead of “just don’t.”
So instead of:
“You can’t jump on the couch,”
it becomes:
“You can’t jump on the couch, but you can jump on your bouncy bee,”
or
“you can jump on this pillow.”
It gives them autonomy.
It reduces power struggles.
And it still honors your boundary.
Bringing It All Together
We veered off-topic many times (as we do), but everything circled back to this:
Raising living room kids is really about raising connected kids.
Kids who learn from you because they’re with you.
Kids who understand boundaries because they practice them in real time.
Kids who see the home as a shared space, not a museum.
It’s messy, beautiful, exhausting, growth-filled — and deeply meaningful.
A Gentle Reflection
Were you a bedroom kid or a living room kid growing up?
And what does your home look like today with your little ones?